4 months

November 2006,

Just kissed the forehead of an angel, is that what every father feels? I wonder….

That’s the upside for you. There are downsides of course, and spare me the crap of “..but oh this is so wonderful.”. Didnt I say that a couple of months back? hehe. Sometimes you just don’t understand how your life turned upside down. My freedom has been taken away… for good or at least for the next 20 years. I cannot go out as I please, or just go for a quiet weekend with the wife and some friends. This is tough and it is just one of the many changes my life undergoes right now. But its the most life changing one: a person depends on me. Its already starting to feel like a big responsibility, and for me as for most men it’s a hard thing to take.

Its still an amazing experience don’t get me wrong and against all the downsides - there is this one smile my child gives me in the morning that just melts my heart.

Anyway, life has its surprises lined up for me I have to say. Its been 4 months now and it feels like time is flying and slowing down at the same time…. you know the feeling?. Everyday brings a new experience – some are good and some are bad. My son got sick for the first time – let me tell you that night was not pretty. But then again he is smiling a lot and he has a great smile too. He is a cute little devil and very active – observing everything and analyzing my words and actions. … hold on a sec. Have to go feed him again.

Back, after 30 minutes. Its hard work no doubt, but its also the best feeling I had in the past few years.

To sum it up in a philosophical note: I want to encourage fresh dads and expecting fathers around the globe: you are not alone, everybody goes through the same thing. Much like every other aspect of life – enjoy the moment because these moments compose your life story and not only yours but another's - a rather small for now, person.

Updates to follow soon,

Sincerely yours,

Dad